Nightmares That Stay
There are nightmares in the world that we ignore,things we see everyday and choose yet not to see,not to touch,not to listen to.We use sanitisers,flush our toilets,curse when the drain gets blocked,spray every thing under the planet till it (eew thingee)drops dead.There are things that will make your flesh crawl,things that happen to beings just like you ,a girl your age was raped all you do is flip to page and think that being a chauvinist is cool! ,as long as youre safe
SOME NIGHTMARES START ONLY WHEN YOU OPEN YOUR EYES TO THINGS YOU CHOOSE NOT TO SEE
I had to meet someone in the cafeteria in college."will be there in ten min" i replied and half jogged down the road after class."there is a puppy thats hurt and with maggots" said a friend as he walked out "its with paul and hope,they need help" .Maggots..... I had heard of those, they where larvae of flies...metamorphosis,i had studied so much about them,the whole procedure left me amazed when I was young "catterpillar to butterfuly"
I saw the puppy and held it up so i could see the wound and then suddenly a wave of nausea kicked me in the stomach ,a sick smell of rotting fish mixed with a faint smell of coconut oil mixing like two slugs trying to do the tango!.I tried to look away and the oil spilt fron the pocket like wound on to my hands,My spine gave me a shock wave tiny white worms crawled in and around the wound .The flesh was actually a joint from the leg bone.The huge ones peeped desperately trying to gasp breadth above the film of coconut oil in clustered groups squirming in a slow ,nearly liquid fashion like aliens triving rich on the body as their host let out irritated cried as they came out of their holes of rotten flesh derperately gasping for air
Paul took a pair of tweasers and picked fat ,white ,spindle shaped worms out as the small ones escaped with only those in clusters unluckily got pulled out.I looked away and buried my head into my arm as i held the pup with the other hand.I could taste my breakfast alright!
slowly I took the pair of tweasers and plucked at the fatty white bags that wriggled.I got used to it,I felt the sickness within subside.I stank of it.my hand glistened with dirt,blood and coconutoil.In all this what was wierd was I had never felt so human in my life....never so aware of what I would become when they buried my dead body.I put her on my lap .
Paul and I took her to a nearby vet bunking class.The doc put a neem oil based spray that made the mogots tumble out like a waterfall when we were on the bike .they fell out like beads.I felt like scratching all over my body ..imagining they were creeping all over me under my clothes.
She sleeps tonight in alans room.
I scrubbed myself with alot of soap,three teaspoons of dettol,shampooed my hair then nearly burned myself with hot water.
We have got a long way to go ,we have learnt so much about everything nothing really surprises us,inspires us,awakens us to what it really feels like to smell,touch,see and know the real picture.
We have to relearn what ever has been programmed into our systems.We have to search for ourselves.....